My 12wbt Round 1 2011 goal

Friday, April 8, 2011

The honest truth about the binging

Yes, I watched TBL this week and I saw Lara's binge after her success on the catwalk. This is the binge that happens when you get scared of the weight loss and you cant quite figure it out. It has been happening to me since Wednesday's weigh in. I am three kilo out from my preseaon goal and five kilo out from a healthy weight loss. It was actually happening with a 2kg weight loss followed by a 1.9kg weight loss the next week. They are pretty damn awesome numbers I was pulling and every part of me believed I could do it so why then did I feel the need to eat everything sweet and still do. My stomach is bloated from dried fruit and is pushing up against my lungs and other internals so that I actually feel pain. There is no doubt that the lollies, the cheese and biccies, the excessive fruit, chocolate, the dried fruit and the forme are all sitting rigth on top of my breakfast of two peices of toast and then there was the pizza. A huge pizza which was predominantly vegies but still it was huge and I ate my way through it. Yesterday was not much different with lollies and excessive yoplait. I have no idea what has got into me so the question is:

WHY WHEN YOU ARE SO CLOSE TO YOUR GOAL, WHEN YOU HAVE ACHIEVED A MODACOM OF SUCCESS, DO WE MAKE STUPID FOOD CHOICES ~ LIKE SELF SABOTAGE, A LITTLE BIT OF SELF LOATHING CREEPS IN, SO WHY WHY WHY DO WE DO IT? Lara did it and I did it (before I saw her do it people but I saw myself in what she did and I wondered.............WHY)? It is nonsense of course and yet I still would eat the chocolate or the icecream right now if it was in the house. It's madness. Why am I self sabotaging?

Anyone got an answer? Anyone know how to get it under control?

And no I wont work it off because I haven't exercised since before I weighed in. If it is a life long, life style change, why did I fall back into my old ways?

To find the answers to this could be the difference between me going back to being tree stumpy or being a hot muma. I want to be the hot muma.

anyone out there got an answer?

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