It was a big loss to me today. I lost my harddrives on my computer. My 12wbt ebooks gone, photos of me and my 12wbt family gone, everything gone, not just 12wbt related, everything. I had three hard drives and backed one up from the other etc but no, fried all the hard drives supposedly. My budget gone (I use this one everyday), shit I cant even work out tweet deck. This is a devastating loss and if I think too much about it I want to eat, because that is where I find comfort. This is a red flag day indeed. NOnetheless I have made it to 8.43pm and not done anything stupid yet. I say yet because the night is young. And just perhaps some bourbon will help me sleep, later that is. Not good but better than a tub of icecream. I should not talk about my comforters because when I do I think about them and thinking right now about food is making me hungry. What to do, What to do???
Seriously I dont know how to cope without the stuff I lost and loosing years of family photos is enough to make me sick to my stomach. I lost the babies birthday photos, school photos, friggin all the photos. I still have first day of school 2011photos on the camera but still it really isn't working for me. I swing between the photos and the budget spreadsheet. I am sad people very sad.
But I ate ok today. I found an excuse for not exercising this morning though. I got up and had pains in my tummy and I just could not bring myself to run. You see I have a slight problem, how real do you want to get? I sometimes struggle to control bowel movements when I exercise and this felt like one of those days. The last time I ran I had one of those days and it is bloody embarrasing after all I am 45years old. Still if this is my biggest problem physically then I am better off than many. At the end of the day though, it is a damn excuse and I used it and so I didn't run. I hope life is better tomorrow, it should be if I dont slip up tonight. Maybe an early bedtime?????